Find a Partner
Mar 26, 2018
When choosing partners, men and women often pursue different goals. It should be remembered that the criteria for choosing a partner for short-term relations differ significantly from the requirements
imposed on a potential spouse.
Men give short-term relationships great value, they want to find the most accessible woman, preferring various, but short-term relationships. Women are always more picky in choosing a partner for short-term relationships, since they are most often evaluated for long-term relationships. Therefore, they highly appreciate men who have achieved professional success and are able to make a successful career.
When choosing a partner for long-term relationships, men and women attach great importance to love and sympathy. In the process of choosing a marriage partner, there are three stages. The first stage is the appearance of interest in a person of a different sex. Much at this time depends on the incentives that make two people pay attention to each other. As already mentioned, at first it is an external attraction, especially important for men. Women are also concerned about the social status of a partner, they often choose the leader they want to follow, older than themselves, and usually more educated. Since women more often take into account the social characteristics of their potential partners, they are less willing than "men" to fall in love "at first sight".
The second stage is characterized by a comparison of ideals, values and passions. This can be a rather lengthy process, as it includes acquaintance with the general culture of the partner, with his political views, life values, behavioral patterns, communicative qualities, emotionality and sexuality. The third stage is a period of mutual adaptation, the development of mutually acceptable forms of behavior and the division of roles. Since the male and female positions in the marriage can be extremely diverse, the latter period often becomes the most difficult stage in choosing a marriage partner. Finding a partner for long, full-fledged relationships is a very difficult task for many. Finding such a person is more difficult than just finding the good-
our sexual partner. He must have a whole list of positive qualities to evoke love and the desire to be with him all the time. Therefore, we must remember that for the successful construction of relationships, time and serious mental work are necessary!
All men want to meet beautiful women and marry them. It is hardly possible, but, fortunately, every man has his own ideas about female beauty. At a deep psychological level, people prefer partners who reflect their unconscious vision of themselves( choose an equal) and possess qualities that they would like to own. People tend to choose their friends and marry those who are perceived by them as equal not only on an intellectual level, but also on the level of attractiveness. As the results of the research showed, 85% of the pairs almost completely correspond to each other in appearance. Many problems with finding a desirable partner arise in individuals with low self-esteem. When there is no confidence in yourself and that you are worthy of love, then it is very difficult to find it.
People prefer to look for a life partner in their social environment: among friends, colleagues, in the places of the usual time of escort. According to some reports, more than 50% of marriages are between people living near each other. The majority also makes a choice among people of close age.
Partnership and Age. Most people marry those who are close to them by age( 1).Usually the difference in age does not exceed 5 years, and a man is usually older. For example, in St. Petersburg husbands are older than wives for an average of 2 years. In a marriage with a large age difference, the male is usually older( 2), and the inverse ratio is much less common( 3).
Places of acquaintance with the future spouse. According to a study in Finland( 1995), a total of 47% of Finns found future life companions at parties and parties. Along with this, joint work, study, neighborhood or a common hobby can bring together, facilitate the establishment of informal relationships, the emergence of love and the establishment of partnerships.
1. Dancing - 24%.
2. Restaurants - 17%.
3. Neighborhood - 8%.
4. Joint schooling - 6%.
5. Acquaintance at work - 6%.
6. Hobbies related to the hobby - 6%.
7. Situations related to work - 5%.
8. General profession training - 4%.
9. During the trip on vacation - 2%.
10. Travel abroad - 1%.
11. Through the dating service - 1%.
12. Other options - 20%.
Options for finding partners:
1. Family celebrations: meetings with distant relatives and friends of the family.
2. Work: establishing relationships with colleagues or with their friends.
3. Further training: improvement in the professional sphere or for your own pleasure.
4. Leisure: visiting theaters, concerts, dances, exhibitions, sports.
5. Collective events: parties, visits to bars, meetings with friends.
6. Public activity: participation in public events, meetings, youth organizations.
7. Dating services: finding a partner using a computer, card indexes, catalogs or with the help of experienced professionals.
8. Travel: travel on vacation, vacation with people with similar interests.
9. Accidental encounters: on the street, at bus stops, in transport, in shops. .. Such options can be an infinite variety.
10. Marriage announcements in newspapers and magazines.