How to stop jealous of a friend - I envy my friend
Mar 06, 2018
Whatever they thought and said about the female friendship of a man, she exists, and the heat of feelings, warmth, faithfulness is not inferior to the illustrious male fraternity. With friends we share joys and catastrophes, we discuss our neighbors, we advise in difficult situations. They make life warmer, brighter and more interesting. We sincerely love them, are attached to them. But it is to the best friends that we sometimes experience this disgusting bitter feeling - envy. Creeps into the soul of a nasty worm. We are so close, we have much in common, but why is she more lucky in life, this is not fair? And no matter how you drive these thoughts away, they come back, poisoning all the bright things that bind us together. It is unlikely that there will be a woman who escaped this test. We are ashamed, we experience and try to understand how to stop jealous of a friend, to keep friendship, not to lose a loved one.
Should I blame myself for what is inherent in almost all of humanity? Envy, like all other feelings, is necessary for people. Looking at others who have achieved more than we can understand what we want and can achieve by ourselves. Perhaps it will take an effort to keep hatred in the soul, not to wish the bad to those who seem to have been unduly favored by fate.
To some extent, envy is a way to become better, a push to improve yourself. And it is very natural that we compare ourselves first with those who are close. By and large, we do not care how many billions the incomes of oligarchs have increased or decreased, but the girlfriend's salary, which is much higher than our own, can not be indifferent. In addition to envy, there is a fear that the difference in material level will destroy the friendship that means so much to both.
How to keep the old friendship
There are plenty of reasons for envy between close friends. A big house, a good family, successes of children, a slim figure, fresh smooth face skin, a successful career, a rich harvest of tomatoes in the country. ...Well, how to stop jealous of a friend, how to reconcile with the fact that she has everything, everything turns out for her, and you have some problems, troubles, endless troubles?
If these thoughts do not give you rest, try to choose a free hour and analyze whether it is really the case or you simply do not see the other side of the question. It also fails to avoid its difficulties and problems.
Let's say a friend got a prestigious position. You seem to be quite worthy of the same, but you are not offered. And why? Maybe she works more efficiently, or has the opportunity to stay late at work, or she is patronized by someone from the boss. Are you also ready to give your personal time to work? And to endure courtship of the person unpleasant to you and to risk family relations? Will not you be permanently responsible for the work of other employees? Try to understand for yourself whether you need a job that creates so many problems. If you are ready for her sake to sacrifice time, tranquility, established family life - begin to act actively. You can achieve a lot, but it will be expensive to pay for it.
There is another side to the problem. Is the girlfriend happy, having the goods you long for? Does not she envy your ability to freely dispose of free time, radiant skin health( even if her figure is slimmer)?Believe me, she has as many reasons to envy you.
Yes, and you once became friends, not because you were equal in everything. You were interested, you complemented each other, and it brought you closer. If you do not want to lose friendship and feel that your friend is also sincerely attached to you, try to keep this union. Allow yourself to envy her a little, but more rejoice at her success. She, so lucky, appreciates you. So you have very serious merits, and you can achieve everything that you really need.