To beat or not to beat children?
Our children adopt the behavior we have with you. If we always say "thank you" and "please", and they( with time) begin to do the same. Polite parents simply can not help being polite. But it is also quite true that if you smell cocaine from the morning before breakfast, children perceive your behavior as the norm. And, finally, directly related to this rule: if you lose your temper with any difficulties and resistance, it is this that becomes a model of the relationship between people for your children.
It's usually not difficult to behave in such a way as to give the children the right example. But it's when you feel the adrenaline bubbling up in your veins that it's the most critical to watch yourself - because children eagerly absorb your models precisely in such uneasy, life situations. Tell me, how do you react to the stubbornness and disobedience of your children? Do you manage not to break, not lose your temper, listen to their point of view, staying calm? God is a witness, this is a difficult matter, but this is the only way to ensure that your children behave in this way.
As a rule, one of the parents in the family is more hot-tempered, and the other is more calm and tolerant. If the latter is not about you, do not execute yourself: your behavior is perfectly normal. However, you must understand that, by losing your temper when dealing with children, you thereby give them "kindness" for the same behavior. As a result, you are the loser. At the moment. But in the future your children probably will not have a hard time if they build their personal lives using such methods of communication.
The same applies to corporal punishment. You can treat them as you like, but the truth is one - they do not work.
Spanking a child, you tell him that people can, at least sometimes, achieve something by force. If this happens to you in the heat of a dispute, the child realizes that you have lost control of yourself. First, the child is frightened, and secondly, when the first fear passes, it begins to absorb, not only it is possible, but it is also necessary( judging by the example of parents) to lose temper and be aggressive. If you beat the child thoughtfully, cold-bloodedly, this proves that you are completely consciously accepting violence and aggression as methods of communication.