Spouses in a uniform team
Jun 19, 2018
"Spouses" - "co-workers" in the general tax of life. The fact that family life is not easy, you know, not from books, but from your own observations of parents, neighbors, acquaintances. How does the relationship between husband and wife in the economic sphere now develop?
Many writers, more recently, with sarcasm and irony, attacked those of their characters who tried to seriously and seriously solve these everyday issues."Immersed in everyday life" - that's how the woman's behavior was certified, if she was engaged in housekeeping, and did not run around the diner herself and did not keep her children on dry rations, on sandwiches with tea, all the rest of the time filling the idol of "beautiful life" with vanity.
Now you are increasingly reading books, you see films that sound a kind of light sadness over the warm, spiritual home pie leaving in the past, for the unpretentious and sweet joys of family gatherings when numerous households gather at a common table, tell stories, tell stories, singsongs, and then they still do handicrafts: they knit, weave, plan, repair.
Here we again find the relationship, the dependence of everything that is done in the house, from social processes.
Home work until recently was the most difficult and inefficient. The peasants, in fact, did not know the time or the time in the work, which all went to satisfy the most basic necessities of life: to eat enough, to have a strong roof over your head, warm and strong clothes and. .. a little joy, fun for the holidays. The same needs were for the urban worker, with the only difference that he acquired food, shelter and clothing for hard work not in the field, but in a factory and a factory. In such conditions, both husband and wife were loaded with work both outside the home and at home. Naturally, the humanists called for the release of people from such bondage, as they called for the alleviation of industrial and peasant labor. Particularly raised the issue of emancipation of women. After all, in the family, all the responsibilities associated with cooking, cleaning the room, washing, sewing, caring for small children, that is, working daily, inescapable, were performed by women. And the cases, although they require great physical strength, but not everyday: the collection of firewood, the construction and repair of the house, the making of all household scraps and inventory, were held in the deft and powerful hands of men.
The development of social production has led to the fact that many labor operations began to be shifted to the iron shoulders of machines, of all kinds of automatic machines. The productivity of labor, its nature, and conditions have also changed. From the impassive, hopeless, often dehumanizing, he gradually turns into a creative, quite diverse and spectacular. And the work of domestic service, cutting to the limit the primordially-manly cares( about wood, about light and heat, about water and cattle), for a woman for a long time remained the same in tension, "assortment" and equipment.
Eternal rounding around a plate, trough, with a floor cloth, needles and a needle in hands. Yes, and what kind of productivity is this: an hour and a half is the landlady at the stove, and the family will manage with its products in fifteen minutes, leaving her a mountain of dirty dishes. And what are these working conditions, if there is no leave, there are no days off and if the hostess, like in ancient times, "is a swine, a reaper, and a dude is a gambler"?
Compared with the most progressive spheres of activity, indeed, homework for a long time looked like an anachronism that took people's time and energy, but nothing gave It seemed that it could well replace the sphere of catering and service. And the woman herself just recently was torn from the "indefinite hard labor" of domestic affairs to work, to the collective, to books, meetings, to travel and creativity.
So it was until recent years. In the second half of the 1970s, a different trend emerged in relation to domestic labor. As a result of the enormous transformations, social and economic, many wives and mothers gained a real possibility of free choice: whether to eat at home or in the dining room, whether to sew or atelier to give, washor use the services of a laundry factory, whether to take care of small children or to instruct teachers in nurseries and kindergartens. It was then that new notes appeared in discussions about everyday life, about its merits and flaws. There were already statements about the advantages of domestic labor in relation to certain public services.
Let's try to understand the essence of this problem together. And first let's talk about the distribution of responsibilities, the degree of congestion of modern men and women.
It is known from sociological studies: 2/3 of all cares and labors around the house now carry a "weak sex", and "strong" at this time "sick" in the stadiums, investigates newspapers, pushes chairs and sofas in front of the TV, or eveneven worse - disappears in beer stands.
And this despite the fact that the woman became a full-fledged ally of men in the national economy. Nowadays, the women of our country make up a large part of the working population. Among specialists with higher and secondary special education, we have 59% of women. In comparison with 1928, the number of such specialists increased by 103 times! In some spheres of social production, science and culture, they generally occupy a dominant position: for example, in trade, public catering, public health, in public education, in recreation, entertainment, social welfare, etc., etc.
One timevoices were heard about the need to return to the traditional distribution of roles in the family: the husband is the breadwinner, the breadwinner, the protector of the household, the wife is the hostess in the house, the offspring of the offspring. To some young people who were not very aware of the true state of things in former times, it seemed that this step would unleash all the conflicting knots in relations between modern spouses.
- I really love my wife and I pity her. Therefore, I will not allow it to be overloaded in a double service. Let her keep her beauty and femininity and let her get only the small things of life: spending, shopping, cooking, caring for children, and I will take upon myself the global problems, like ensuring our material well-being, the social status of the family. What we are weaker than our ancestors, so as not to pull this burden?
Similar statements have been heard repeatedly. Naive judgments. More precisely, illiterate.
First, in the old days no man was the breadwinner of the family. A woman from the poor, the workforce, has previously combined work to feed the family with purely domestic chores, was the second breadwinner of the family, and even the only one. These are widows, soldiers, wives floating and wandering! This is - unmarried mothers, whom in former times, severe for illegitimate children, the time was not so little. Some of the women were in charge of the "family business", like the well-known Kabanikhi, Vassa Zheleznova, etc.
Russian peasant women, the wives of artisans, small tradesmen shared with their husbands all the hardships of getting their livelihood, sometimes not far from the stove and trough. And the wives of the workers often went to factories and factories themselves, or supplemented the staff of the master servants: they became laundresses, cooks, seamstresses. Only those who had seven children on the bench were staying at home and then hired for a day labor. Even the infamous Chekhovian Dushechka, who served as a target for hail of ridicule, being a married woman, combined service in the theater and in the woodshed with the efforts of the housework.
Only well-to-do aristocrats did not know cares and work, and that is not all, but with a certain attitude to life values and joys. They did not work at home, they did not give birth to children, and if they produced one or two, they completely transferred them to the care of hired teachers and teachers.
"One of the most ridiculous ideas that we inherited from the era of enlightenment of the XVIII century is the opinion that at the beginning of the development of society a woman was a slave to a man. .. The division of labor between both sexes is determined not by the status of women in society, but by entirely different reasons. Peoples who have to work for women far more than they are supposed to do, often have much more genuine respect for women than our Europeans. The lady of the epoch of civilization, surrounded by seeming reverence and alien to any real work, occupies an infinitely lower social position than does the hard work. .. which was considered by the people to be the real lady. .. and according to the nature of her position she was hers "(Marx K., Engels F. Soch., Vol. 21, p. 53).F. Engels, as you can see, believed that hard work did not prevent a woman from being a "real lady".Moreover, the women of some tribes of American Indians, who were also mentioned in Engels's book The Origin of the Family, Private Property and the State, as true ladies, without departing from the hearth and not substituting husbands for hunting, performed the basic affairs of their tribe,his leaders, while not losing the truly feminine properties of nature, like the English proletarians of the late nineteenth century.
The inability of society to move back is due to the laws of historical development, social, economic and psychological considerations. The modern economy of a developed socialist society can not do without the participation of half of its able-bodied population in productive labor. Yes, and this "half" is unlikely to want to abandon the realization of their abilities in the field of social labor. He will not want to give up material independence.
Experience has proved: a wife and mother who has limited her horizons only to household chores is less able to understand and share the extra-family concerns of her husband and children. And she will be less educated, a teacher of narrow categories of her own clan, which is also important in the present conditions, when children have before them constant examples of women who are erudite, widely educated, successfully coping with work and family responsibilities. Naturally, such a comparison will not be in favor of mother-housewife.
- And what about the mother of Vladimir Lenin, Maria Alexandrovna, the wife of Karl Marx, Jenny Marks? They never served, and were for their children and husbands - an ideal, indisputable authority, women highly educated for their time and even versatile talents. They gave all their talents to the family. And no one put such a "sacrifice" in their reproach. On the contrary, only admired and took as an example.
To say that both eminent women were only "housewives" means to impoverish their role in the activities of those who deserve the love and worship of the Communists of all countries. They were companions, assistants, one - a brilliant son and other children - revolutionaries, the other - a genius husband. And this was their work, which was in harmony with a conscious and responsible attitude to purely maternal and conjugal duties. They never considered domestic cares something unimportant, depressing and stupefying their soul.
Many modern women have formed a value system in which domestic works, unfortunately, have the lowest ratings. Is it possible to expect in this case due diligence, art in the performance of family responsibilities, the deep satisfaction experienced by many mothers and wives who saw in domestic chores the opportunity to actively express their love? Of course not.
Rating scale. Is not it the reason for the dissatisfaction of many and quite well-off women?
About who she is - a woman - in her own house, that for herself and for those around her everyday worries, cares, experiences, one way or another comprehends each of us. In childhood, we think about mother, about other adult women, that they are too little engaged in family and us, that they always run away somewhere, rush. No, to stay with those who need them most, that is, with their children. Then, having acquired our own house, we see everything in a different light: we regret time, strength, ability, which takes away the house, tearing us away from our favorite work, interesting people and meetings. And becoming grandmothers and looking at the next generation of young women from the height of their own experience and maturity, we are again annoyed: how carelessly and selfishly daughters and daughter-in-law spend time and themselves. Well, good work would distract, and then even ateliers, hairdressers, TV, parties, cult and hiking! It would be better to sit with the children, work out with those who are most needed now and who they themselves most need. After all, nothing - neither a film nor a book - can compare with the enjoyment that a growing child gives. And at the same time, being grandmothers, we do not want to, we can not limit ourselves to the walls of the house: our cares and joys are not enough for us to feel a full life.
You see how the judgment about the same subject varies with age. We have already talked about the cyclical nature of a person's relationship to his family, to his home. In earlier times this cyclicity had less effect on the behavior of a woman, since her social position was dependent and the household did not let go of herself. Now she has the opportunity to realize her desires, abilities in the business sphere. Because it is in certain periods more burdensome domestic work than the public, and in others - on the contrary: pulls it to settle at home.
The valuation of family values is also changing, depending on the level of education, the culture of women. The higher the education, the farther it is in production from manual labor, the less pleasure it experiences from domestic occupations, the more it protests against "enslaving" them. In the newspaper discussions on the problems of women's workload, the division of duties between husband and wife strongly dominates the voices of scientific collaborators, actresses, journalists, teachers, doctors, lawyers. Only occasionally do factory workers and builders come into dispute. The village dwellers are silent: milkmaids, who, it would seem, should first of all protest against physical overloads.
With a careful study of this paradox, when the more noisy those who combine physical labor with the mental only in favor, it was possible to find out its causes. First of all, they are in the social significance of education, the evaluation of intellectual types of labor. More recently, higher education, and gymnasium( by today's standards - the average) was the privilege of the propertied classes. And this means that the family, who had access to education, had enough money to shift all household concerns to the servants' shoulders. Lawyers, officials, doctors, teachers, actors, however poor and unsuccessful, never washed the sexes themselves, did not prepare their own food, or washed their underwear. For this there were poor, men and women, ready for a corner, food and pennies to do all the rough work.
In the Soviet era, even after the war, there were still differences between people with higher education and those who had a minimum and readily took on the service of representatives of intelligent work. Housekeepers, nannies were common. Gradually this category of family assistants disappeared, or rather - these workers moved to the state sphere of labor. Being a servant from a private person has become unjustifiable.
Now education has become the property of the whole people. This is the highest social achievement, as well as the gradual erasure of the facets between mental and physical labor in social production. However, the stereotype of consciousness is changing very slowly. That is why many workers in the intellectual sphere still have claims that all rough work should be done by someone, housekeepers or "housekeepers", that is, atoms, not by them. In particular, women are seeking this - creative workers and leaders: at work they are respected, authoritative people, manage the affairs of large groups, and in their own house - like servants.
Another reason for dissatisfaction is the specificity of mental work. To achieve certain professional heights in the field of intellectual work, in a leadership position, it is necessary to concentrate all thoughts on work. And how to do it, if a woman is forced to think about a lot of domestic chores, about raising a child, about the health of the household? Her head is one: if she is occupied with professional cares, then, naturally, is turned off from family interests, and if she is turned to her house with her thoughts, important problems are missed. Therefore, women engaged in manual labor, sometimes easier to combine work in production with a family load. After all, modern domestic work is hard not so much physical as nervous strain. Caring - that's what weighs more than doing housework.
Many researchers of human nature in order to prove the intellectual superiority of men have always cited a list of geniuses from among representatives of the same sex and a very modest list of the names of female Titans. In all likelihood, the root cause of this disproportion is precisely that motherhood is the highest act of creativity and the subsequent care for the family and children did not allow the woman to concentrate her intellect on the scientific and artistic level. Today, a woman is tired not so much from physical overload as from the uneven distribution of work.
Wife-mother would withstand much greater hardship if she saw: all households are also busy, too, the head is hurting about the house."Together - not heavy. And apart - at least throw it. "
Why is all the attention in the debate about economic affairs focused on women's well-being? Is the state of the modern man in his own house so carefree and carefree? How does it solve the problems that arise?
A man in the house. .. We have already said: he has made his working burden in the family much easier. Was it easier and more comfortable for him? Of course not. Less labor - less authority. Far-sighted husbands now themselves are looking for a useful lesson, the short-sighted seek an excuse for their idleness. First of all, they hide behind the tradition: they say that domestic work has always been a woman's lot, and anyone who hastens to connect to it, it seems, was "under the heel" of his wife. And they do not notice that they themselves turned out to be "under the thumb" of prejudices: if indeed there is a work that can humiliate men's dignity. But it would be worthwhile for them to look around, as the judgment would have shattered. The most famous chefs, cooks are men. For a long time, they also used to work in laundries, tailors, polishers, glass washers. ..( you can continue this list) - who are they? Are not the experts deserving of our recognition? Even if husbands do not achieve professional mastery in cooking, washing, and simply will be able to perform any of these works, it will already raise them in the eyes of a loving wife. But what to say about the family, when in a purely masculine environment - in the army - an artisan who does not fall out of his hands with a cook or a needle, is a very authoritative person. The same is in the geological party, in the long voyage and travel, in the hike. However, the hike in your midst also opens up new leaders, these guys are all hands of the masters, that both the fire will be kindled into the damp weather, and the soup is prepared from nothing, and the broken pants will be repaired, so you will not notice the trail.
Modern men can find a use in the maintenance of all kinds of household appliances, and in the invention of household appliances. Pay attention: such a solid magazine as "Science and Life", almost from the number in the room publishes a description of all kinds of crafts, to which busy and knowledgeable men do not consider it shameful to spend time and thinking energy. And what spread was the enthusiasm for home-building furniture, carpentry. Sometimes you look at the "walls" constructed by the skilled hands of the owner of the house, and you are surprised: after all, the talent for nothing has not been lost, although the main occupation of this man has nothing to do with his hobby. And he is happy, and the wife is proud, and the children an example.
And outside the walls of his own house a lot of work, which the man first and foremost on the shoulder. Procurement of products, carrying heavy bags would long ago have become a truly masculine occupation. Hikes in laundry, in various kinds of repair shops and atelier are burdensome for women, not only because of physical stress and loss of precious time, but also because of communication with the employees of the service life. More precisely - with workers, as well as with saleswomen. It has already been proved: less conflict is communication between people of different sexes. Hence, where on one side of the counter, the reception room of the reception room is a woman, on the other side it is better to be a man.
Any business paints a person, idleness, albeit comfortable, comfortable, corrupts and destroys. The thoughtless "killing" of time( under the guise of rest) inevitably draws for drunkenness, debauchery of morals - the most terrible vices that kill the family at the same time. As the great Russian pedagogue KD Ushinsky wrote, it is necessary that "it becomes impossible that lackey forwarding of time when a person remains without work in his hands, without thinking in his head, because it is at these moments that his head, heart and morality deteriorates."
What exact word is found here: "lackey" forwarding of time, and not philistine, as we often say. Petty bourgeoisie - active category, to fussiness. Namely, lackeys are not concerned about anything, do not feel sorry for anyone, do not feel responsibility for others. Let the owner-master in the family - his wife hurts his head. If only time to spend in warmth and convenience. The most sad feeling is usually caused by young people who prepare themselves in advance for the "lackey" image of home life, and not for the master's life, to the head and the whole house.
And yet, can not automation and mechanization of domestic work be accelerated so that everything would be done by clever robots, as in I. Efremov's novel "The Andromeda Nebula": clicked on the button - and a table appears, full of dishes, and then it disappears from all overa mountain of dirty dishes? And with him disappears one of the reasons for strife and quarrels.
Let's trace the emerging trend in this area and what kind of acquisition and loss promises us "robotization" of family production.
Looking closer to the current household, we are forced to admit that complaints about its archaic nature, that domestic work does not decrease, are wrong. If a peasant woman, in the middle of the present century, had to spend long hours of hard physical work preparing some simple dish, say milk noodles, now this procedure takes a minute for the townspeople.
Look: our grandmother was to help her husband in sowing and harvesting, grind grain( often manually), sift the flour, then knead the dough, adjust the noodles. And she did not take milk at a neighboring store: she mowed the grass, and hayled the hay, and fed the cow, she drank, milked, butter puffed. And the process of cooking soup required a huge expenditure of time and effort: draw water( from a river or a well), bring firewood, melt the stove. .. Uff! One enumeration is tedious. That is why the hostess got up before dawn, went to bed - dark. She rested at the spinning wheel, had fun with knitting in her hands, sang, shaking the cradle.
Today, a city woman is away at home almost all day. He spends three or four hours on all business matters. And in this period, time to remake as many cases as not every of its predecessor, the needlewoman was in time. Why? Yes, because the very nature of domestic work, its equipment have nothing to do with the old.
We use highly efficient heating and heating devices: tiles, irons, washing machines, juicers, refrigerators and other items that have significantly reduced our expenditure. It is estimated that one worker from the public catering sector for a full working day( 8 hours) can feed only 8 people. This includes, of course, the labor costs of not only the cooks themselves, but also a multitude of auxiliary workers( dishwashers, distributors, waiters, storekeepers, handymen and managers of canteens and restaurants, as well as accountants, inspectors, etc.).And one mistress for an hour and a half will prepare food for a family of three or five people.
In its productivity, energy-electrified and mechanized, modern domestic work becomes a kind of industrial one.
At the same time, we will find impressive examples of how, together with heavy, multi-operation physical exertion, a person is "freed" from the necessary ones. Judging by the data of the researchers, we reduced the physical loads to 1-2%, in comparison with the opportunities that nature has endowed us with. And this means that we have weakened by 98% in comparison with our ancestors.
What will become of us, if for us all will do home robots? You can recall the novel "451 ° Fahrenheit" by American science fiction writer Ray Bradbury. The wife of the protagonist, chained to bed( not sickness, idleness), is only interested in the television "kin", not having her own, having no children, not noticing her husband. Yes, and he really does not know: why every day returns to the disgraced house. There are no common causes, no common worries, no interests either. The less in a family of common labor, common concerns, the less the interest of husband and wife, parents and children in each other. Labor has not only created man, he alone helps him to remain a man, not an automatic machine that consumes automatic goods.
Gerontologists, that is, specialists who study longevity, amicably note this feature: the health of both men and women, obviously, depends on the degree of physical activity - the more it is, the longer a person lives. And family people therefore have all the advantages over bachelors.
Of course, people are harmful and excessive loads. Each of us should determine the measure of effort, which, while helping to develop potential opportunities, will not simultaneously turn into a driven horse. Harmony in the work, as in all other spheres, should be created by the proportionality between "I can", "I want" and "should".
Those who have a sense of proportion, every hour of effort spent on domestic production, is not crossed out of life, but is added to it. It is worth adding to our time, to our forces, to our delight a solid makeweight that the family receives in the form of preserved health. This is cooking food, depending on the state of the body, age, even taste quirks. And cleaning the housing from dust, dirt, increasingly accumulating in the atmosphere of cities and causing allergies, asthma and other diseases, etc.
We highly appreciate the achievements of modern medicine in the fight against the Hvorians. But we must pay tribute to women's hands, which, not knowing they are tired, they wash, clean, tinder, iron. They helped doctors to nullify typhus, dysentery, cholera and other human disasters.
- It is not necessary to exercise the muscles of your hands with washing and cleaning. And the legs are not in one running around for shopping and standing in lines strengthened. Where it is more pleasant to jog, exercise, training in a dance club.
Again, there are serious objections to this opponent. First of all, we have before us an example of single young people, married men and women living behind a broad parental back without any trouble and trouble. A negligible percentage of them are really looking for additional loads on the muscles, most of them continue to intensively cultivate comfort and immobility.
I want to remind one more utterance of K.D. Ushinsky: "There are also such gentlemen who do not already have absolutely no business in life, come up with an occupation for the sake of mental and physical exercise: they sharpen, play billiards or just run around the streets to finish offa sumptuous breakfast and return the appetite for dinner, but such work is of the same importance as the Roman glutton that was vomited at the table: stirring up the hunt for new pleasures, it helps to upset the soulful and bodily organism of man. Work is not a game or a game; it is always serious and serious;only a full consciousness of the need to achieve this or that goal in life can cause a person to take upon himself the burden that constitutes the necessary accessory of all true labor. "
You can not compare sport with domestic work, as they have different moral educational impact on others. First of all, children. Physical culture, as we know, is devoid of an obvious altruistic principle: muscles are pumped up for our own health and pleasure, and doing housework, while strengthening our physical condition, is at the same time the benefit and benefit of other family members. Agree that to teach unselfish service to the common good in words has never succeeded. When mother and father sacrifice their free time, strength, interests for the sake of health of each other and children, this is the most convincing lesson of diligence, selflessness.
I happened to get acquainted with the results of the surveys conducted in the colonies for juvenile offenders and stumbled teenagers. Such a phenomenon was discovered: for all and every differences in the fate and character of the children who fell into such sad places, they had one common, clearly expressed property-an aversion to work, to any, physical, mental.
"Laziness - the mother of all vices" - this you have known for a long time. And the biographies of the "children of laziness" convince: they are not born with this vice, they are infected in families, where the senior each labor effort is accompanied by wailing, curses.
Fortunately, most families knowingly and responsibly relate to domestic chores. There is a noticeable shift in the views of people of intellectual work. Their own experience and research have convinced that to the basic human needs: the needs for food, in the water, in the continuation of its kind, it is necessary to add information hunger and muscle. It was the last - the muscular hunger - that caused modern, spoiled comfort of the townspeople, both men and women, to look for additional loads. It is noticed: many mistresses refuse services of special services. They sew, knit, wash clothes. Men more and more often roll up their sleeves and wield regular shovels, saws, axes, hammers, chisels, build summer houses, dig in the land, again acquire domestic animals. Gradually pride in what the family has, begins to yield more worthy of pride - to what the family knows.
Probably, and not keep up with the public service for the home, how not to keep up with the machine for the person in creating things and services that meet our individual taste and needs. It is no mere chance that in the world market hand-made products are gaining an ever greater price, and on our city market fresh vegetables from a private kitchen garden, sour cream from its cow.
There is another turning point in the topic of domestic work: how does automation of household services affect children, interpersonal relationships, feelings, adult connections?"Craftsmanship", the improvisation of home production ensured and the uniqueness, variety of "products".We are all so different not only because of our genetic structure, but also because of the dissimilarity of the environment, ways and habits.
The standardization of being must also presuppose the standardization of consciousness, tastes, habits, attitudes. We are now interested in the statements of doctors and with delay, we are starting to re-discover the simplest truths for ourselves: from the food that is quite material, not only does the physiological state depend, but also to a certain extent the psychology of man.
Education - this word has two meanings. Purposeful growth of the child on food physical and spiritual at the same time. And if we all turn to the medium-standard Stolovsky diet, how will this affect our children?
Demographers noted: from one "Cheryomushki" to other people move painlessly, sometimes without even trying to back, to the sources, nostalgia, an indispensable companion of migrants. Thrust home arises when the image of the house is absorbed by all the senses: when it contains special sounds, colors, smells, special and invariable attitudes, traditions."Unfamiliar expression" is required not only for works of art, but for our homes and families, in order to be attractive to children and family.
And to make our everyday cares more easy and even pleasant you can, as they say, without departing from the stove, in a simple and cheap way: to look for in each unpleasant occupation the reverse side.(Albert Schweitzer, the outstanding humanist philosopher of modern times, considered morality and an optimistic attitude to be the basic condition for the progress of mankind, his culture should also be educated on optimism and ethics that permeate every small matter.)
Here is an example of this approach. Sociologists have calculated how many kilometers a woman passes from the plate to the dining table and back. Many kilometers! It is possible, after learning this, to begin to feel sorry for yourself and for the sake of those for whom it is done. And you can also rejoice: because these kilometers lengthen the life path in comparison with those women and men who shy away from such loads.
You will say: not serious consolation. It depends. I'll have to admit that the more serious people are about everyday life, the more games, jokes and fictions are brought into it. We need to look for each share of our joy, cheerfulness and deliberately cover your eyes for the shady side of the work that you do not want to do, but you must fulfill it. However, it depends on us and the painful "should" illuminate the pleasantness of "I want, I can."
Now a lot is written about auto-training: a person can inspire himself that he is calm and complacent, when he is agitated, annoyed. Why should not these techniques be used during unpleasant household chores?
Husbands and wives, apparently, will not have constant claims to each other and resentment, if the classes and duties will be distributed primarily taking into account personal characteristics and natural opportunities. At whom that is good it turns out, to this business and to charge. And at the same time treat with full respect for the unusual way of performing tasks. Some authoritative nature leaders recognize only their methods and methods of work admissible."Do as I do," they demand from relatives. And this is caused by unnecessary quarrels, furious resistance of those who would be glad to carry out the assignment, but in their own way, how handy it is to him. A blind copy - rarely there are hunters.
And here, in the family, as in our general state economy, the initiative of every participant in domestic affairs should be highly valued and encouraged in every way, because it is better than thoughtless, mechanical performance. It is evidence of the indifference of the one who performs the task entrusted. Even if the initiative at first causes all sorts of inconveniences, even if fragments of broken dishes fly from under inept hands, croups are poured, milk is poured. These losses are not so devastating for the family, as the result of fear of something to spoil the indifference, and even laziness.
People are always more waiting and looking for independent work, opportunities to invent, try. The wider the field for this kind of search in our home, the more its members work with great interest and pleasure. And the more a person puts his work into any business, the more he gets attached to him with a soul.
The chapter on family work and distribution of responsibilities was the most voluminous. This is not accidental. On household duties, the lion's share of time, the strength of husband and wife, is spent. Not only poets, but also for mere mortals, "love boats" often break down about everyday life.
Domestic affairs are an active manifestation of love, and not something that is categorically opposed to it.
Now, perhaps, by fulfilling the instructions of the parents or by looking for yourself at home, you will know: by this work you not only pay the debt of gratitude to the mother-father, facilitate their fate, you also prepare yourself for the future works that will allow you to becomeAtlanteans, who support a clear set of their own family happiness. Pump the muscles of the hands, soul, mind, be indefatigable and inventive. It is difficult to teach - it is easy in battle, in the battle for peace and well-being of your home, including.
Homework after this chapter ask yourself. And let it be a daily, growing, more complicated, because it is more and more meaningful and interesting.