Is it easier to discipline a child who receives loving care?
Discipline is a magic word that you are not expecting - it is really easier to establish contact between parents and the child. Sensitivity, born of loving care, gives parents the ability to intuitively see what is happening through the eyes of their child. For example, one of the most common problems that terrifies parents of one-year-old children is hysteria, which can happen when a child is ordered to finish playing activity, because "it's time to go."How many times have I heard parents say: "Yes, he just does not want to listen to anything."For many years I have seen how this problem is solved with our little ones Marta. Because her sensitivity allows her to see things from the point of view of her own child, she understands why parting does not go smoothly and why the child rolls up a fit when he is forced to finish the game when he is not ready yet. Her
manages to cope with this, by what she calls it, the closing ceremony: a few minutes before the time will be distracted from the game, Martha goes down to the baby and suggests saying "goodbye" to every toy and all the children who are with himwere playing. Such a sensitive understanding gives him the opportunity to complete his game. Loving care makes life easier with a one-year-old child.
Discipline, or order, or obedience, is not something that you must impose on a child. This is what you should go to together with with the child. In a nutshell, the order begins with knowing your child and with your desire to ensure that your child is well. A child who is well, will behave more likely and will continue to act, based on internal attitudes, and not under the influence of external force. Parents who are able to understand their child can figure out the real meaning of the child's actions and direct them to the desired course. A favorite child likes to give pleasure. Order is a form of relationship between a parent and a child that can be expressed in one word - trust. A child who trusts an adult authoritative for him is easier to manage. An adult who understands the child, the child obeys better. Parents who give loving care,
sooner will achieve their children's desired behavior, and those who feel caring children more easily understand what kind of behavior they are expected of. Children with whom you have established a deep connection, it is easier to accustom to order.
Great problems with discipline arise when a distance appears between the parent and the child. A distant parent is at a dead end when "nothing works," and approaches the direction of discipline, as to the use of a list of foreign methods, many of which only increase the distance between them. Children who are separated from their parents by the abyss are much more difficult to call for order, because they are driven by anger, not trust.
The main virtue of this high-end style of parental behavior is the ability to understand your child. To get an internal connection - that's where the order begins.
One of the most important long-term results of loving care is that you set a good example. Remember that you are raising someone's future husband or wife, father or mother. As you do, because your child is watching, so, most likely, he will act when he becomes a parent himself. Children adopt the manner of treatment of newborns at an early age, and these first impressions remain with them forever.
One day at the reception in my office, my mother brought a newborn, and after her came her three-year-old daughter Tiffany, the result of loving care. As soon as the baby, Aaron, began to worry, Tiffany pulled her mother by the skirt, whispering very excitedly: "Mom, Aaron cries. Take it, shake it, calm down! "What do you think Tiffany will do when she becomes a mother and her own child cries? She will not run to call the doctor and will not look for the answer in the book. She will trust her intuition, take the baby in her arms, shake and calm her.
Even adolescents adopt the treatment of newborns. Once, Martha and I were sitting in the living room when we heard our daughter Erin, then nine months old, start crying in our bedroom, where we put her to sleep. As soon as we reached the door, the weeping stopped. Puzzled, we peered inside to see why Erin stopped crying, and what opened to our eyes left a warm feeling in our hearts. Jim, our
The way you treat the baby is the pattern that your children follow.
sixteen-year-old son, lay next to Erin, stroked her and calmed her down. Why did Jim do this? Because he followed our pattern: when children cry, parents come to their aid.