First love

The topic, which particularly touches and worries. Which of the many heart drives, the longing of the soul, we call the first love of ?When does it arise and how does it differ from the second, the third? After all, if there is a "first", there must be a continuation in the account. Otherwise, we can only talk about the only one that the hero of the film "I Ask to Blame for My Death for Klavu K.", for example, is experiencing, who fell in love with the girl in kindergarten and carried on an unflagging feeling in many years - before joining the youthful age, where we are andwe leave. And it may well be, this affection will last forever.

Such love is a dream, an ideal of all times and peoples. However, like an ideal friendship, it is the lot of the chosen, the lucky ones. In most cases, poetic stories about the first love in the memories of mature years are covered with light sadness. Because it had its own beautiful beginning, a bright flowering and, alas, an inevitable end. Otherwise, I repeat, it would have been called differently.

Perhaps, and to assess whether this is love, we can only after many years. Because the human heart begins its mysterious and exciting work very early. And our first love-delight, in fact, is not a beautiful girl or an interesting boy, but. .. our moms-dads. This was said by ancient philosophers. And our contemporary American doctor Benjamin Spock, whose books about the upbringing of children and the preparation of young people for marriage are widely known in the world, assures: children from three to six years of age create themselves a romantic ideal of a man and a woman whose prototype is Mom and Dad. Subsequent hobbies will be unconsciously correlated with this standard.

If the child is not lucky, he and his parents did not have a mutual affection, then he will search for his ideal, starting from the parent image, that is, he will search for "antimama" or "antipope."

Well, how many heartfelt shocks do we experience in school years, long before meeting with Her( with Him)?And can we assume that all this is not important for our experience? For example, who from adults does not recall from time to time the strong unrest experienced in the first classes, when the most wonderful, beautiful, kind( for girls and boys is equal) was the first teacher. And so I wanted her to love, different from only you!

One elderly woman confessed: until now she remembers how she cried with jealousy when the teacher stroked the head of others, how she hated her husband for the rough tone with which he addressed the idol of the first-graders, and all invented revenge and intrigues, that he "got rid of "his wife. Enchanted in the teacher everything: appearance, voice, smile, gait. When memory and photographs now reproduce a genuine, not idealized portrait, then there is no similarity to the fact that the child's imagination and love were born, is not found. Everything, as in adult love: the same capacity for self-deception, the same jealousy and sacrifice.

Then the teacher takes a place of a movie hero, singer, actress, athlete( athlete).Another kind of worship begins, but not less long and passionate. There is a pursuit of photos, tape recordings, articles, T-shirts, bags with the image of "idol".They refuse to do everything necessary, just to see again( hear) the one who struck the imagination and heart. But this passion is also passing, the new idol is eclipsing the former one. But is not it all like the First Love?

And not a single generation of sixth-graders passing through a game of dating, notes, secrets, which are usually known to everyone. And also jealousy, vows, quarrels, tears. The next day - everything is forgotten.

The fact that high school students can be immediately attracted by several of their peers( peers), and even adults from among their parents' friends-acquaintances. And it is rare for someone to accurately weigh-evaluate the degree of authenticity, depth, long-term next hobby.

- Let me do it, - you will say. - But now the ten-year-olds know how love differs from all this children's imagination game.

Perhaps, it is not known. Not only children, even adults, are doubtful: what is what? Remember, A. Herzen called the main feature of the first love that she "forgets the difference of the sexes".Many poets and writers object to such a statement, although they also know: the desire for physical intimacy, caresses and kisses may mean not the advent of Love, but only the onset of puberty.

We will have to interrupt our reasoning to agree on what kind of content we will continue to invest in this capacious word to the immensity - "love".In Russian, in one word, such incommensurable concepts are denoted as a predilection for a dish, for a thing, for a house, hobby for business, art, attachment to relatives, to a chosen one( chosen one), serving an idea, a native land. All these feelings and relationships are called love. Although we are aware of the difference in the content of the word, but with its many meanings, incidents like the expression "I like to drink tea with my wife and jam" are quite possible. In order to clearly understand what kind of feeling we are talking about, let's try to distinguish this concept.

The well-known Soviet researcher of the problem we are discussing, writer Yu. B. Ryurikov, with the epigraph to the book Three Lures, took the definition of love extracted from the ancient Eastern love treatise:

. As can be seen, human love is the indissoluble unity of the physical, spiritual and intellectual drive directed atone object. At the same time, the writer in his book warns against preferring one of the three drives to the detriment of the other two. In his opinion, everything is the same in love: The differentiation of these drives into ranks - the lower and the higher - is the result of the centuries-old domination of the Christian religion in the morals and customs of European peoples. Christianity by all means, including through all kinds of art, implanted a view of bodily needs as sinful, dirty, shameful.

Humanist atheists fought intensively with such an attitude that belittles natural human feelings. However, they also considered some physical needs, not ennobled by the light of the soul and heart, not regulated by reason, a phenomenon of a lower order. By the way, in the quote from the Eastern treatise, the spiritual and intellectual attraction is put not by chance in the first place.

From the anatomy courses and from the cycle of sexual hygiene conversations, you are aware that we all experience a variety of physiological needs: in food-drinking, in clean air, in shelter, in alternation of sleep and wakefulness, tension and relaxation, finally, in the continuation of a kind. These are primary and universal needs, inherent not only to man, but also to animals. But there is still a need for caress, attention, caring, the need to take care of someone, to caress someone, to patronize someone. They are experienced only by highly organized beings.

The desire for bodily, sexual intimacy in this list of needs in animals plays a subordinate, service role: it is only a means to accomplish such an important goal as the continuation of the genus. In the human hostel, these so-called animal instincts, as a rule, are socialized, cultivated by upbringing. The higher the development of society in which a human child was born, the higher the spiritual culture of his closest relatives, the more complex the form of manifestation of natural needs and instincts.

People quench their desires and needs, focusing on the rules and norms prescribed by the environment. Some change these rules, but they also do not so much invent new ones, as they take over from other people.

Amendments to the character of everyday behavior are naturally made by the temperament, the uniqueness of the individual, the scale and strength of the individual. In one, physical needs suppress spiritual aspirations. And then even about the strong, energetic, seemingly independent person, like Pushkin's Aleko, they say with regret:

There are also known opposite phenomena: lofty ideals suppress sensual drives, and love does not receive earthly embodiment. If we all and always experienced only asexual attraction, the human race would be translated. Yes, and life itself would be deprived, lost many bright colors. Let's look at mother nature: she decorates all living things at the time of marriage in the most magnificent decorations, reads the world with beautiful songs and passionate sounds. The beauty of the earth is the visible embodiment of love.

But again we have to admit that living life is much more complicated than any right theory and scheme. In the practice of human relationships, you rarely meet equipollent and equally expressed drives. Something always prevails, something is less pronounced. Then we can talk about the existence of several types of "love": when the desire prevails is love-passion;when the heart attraction is predominant - it is love-respect, there is also love-duty. Of course, such a division is very arbitrary and each of you can call your feeling in some other words, but the meaning, the content of the concepts will be closer to the ones cited.

When you begin to recognize the multifaceted nature of a feeling called love, you cease to be surprised at the inconsistency of statements about her sages and poets passing from sacred songs to curses.

"In love, as in hatred, a wide variety of feelings can be combined: suffering, and pleasure, and joy, and sadness, and fear, and courage, and even anger and hatred"( K. Ushinsky).

You have noticed that the triad of true love - desire, friendship, respect - is very similar to the triad that we define as the harmonic basis of personality: the combination of "I want, I can and should."

It must be acknowledged that during the marital life this feeling can change, move from one state to another. VG Belinsky defined the "seasons of the year" in love: "Love has its own laws of development, its ages, like human life. It has its own luxurious spring, its hot summer, and finally autumn, which for some people is warm, bright and fertile, for others cold, rotten and sterile. "

In all likelihood, this may mean that at the beginning of the emerging cordial relations among youngpeople love-passion prevails, gradually it can grow into love-friendship, and then into love-respect. No matter how beautiful the spring, flowers, nightingale trills, cloudless radiance of the heavens can not last forever. All the beauty of love in nature, as you know, is not an end in itself, but a means for the reproduction of life. And the flowers fall, and the sweet birds stop, in order to create the miracle of the birth of fruits, chicks, and offspring in silence and perseverance.

You can find the statements of VG Belinsky and KD Ushinsky in the collection of aphorisms "Symphony of Reason" in the section devoted to love. Here there are other statements of the great critic about love. Gathering them together, you can find some contradiction in his views on the nature of this feeling.

These are the aphorisms:

"Every love is true and beautiful in its own way, if only it was in the heart, and not in the head."

"The heart has its own laws - it's true, but not so, from which it would be easy to compile a detailed systematic code."

"One can not deny the influence of moral qualities on the feeling of love, but when they love a person, they love him all, not as an idea, but as a living person, they love in him especially what they neither know nor call."

"Man is not an animal or an angel;he must love not the animal and not platonically, but humanly. "

"True human love can be based only on mutual respect for each other in human dignity, and not on one whim of feeling and not on one whim of the heart."

"For love you need a reasonable content, like oil to support the fire."

Probably, you, too, struck a different estimation of the role of the mind in the heart attraction. From complete denial through the assumption of necessity - to affirmation. If we apply the temporary gradation of Belinsky himself to this change of relations, then it is easy to recognize what judgment was expressed at the time of the "splendid spring", what - in the summer and which - in the mature autumn. In this case, it is not necessary that a certain opinion exactly correspond to the passport age of the person himself or the age of his marriage.

As in nature, in the senses of ours, the change of "seasons" happens even for a relatively short time and rhythmically( we will talk specifically about biorhythms of love).And then you can see that the loving heart is experiencing spring anxiety and languor today, and a month later - the cooling has found a soothing cold, and there - a light sadness and respectful surprise is replaced by impatient irritation, which, in turn, gives way to feelings of guilt and compassion. And a person who is not prepared for such "temperature" and temporary fluctuations, can completely lose faith in the authenticity of his love. After all, according to romantic ideas, it should burn with an even and high flame, without recessions and fluctuations, in any weather.

And in life it happens extremely rarely, if at all. Unless it is a fire that is lit in a tightly enclosed shelter from the living life.

So, from the general definition of human love, let's return to the feeling that we call First Love.

We already know that Herzen described this feeling as unconscious and not burdened by the carnal desire of the longing of the heart.

From the aspirations of the lover the most powerful is to look and see and not take your eyes off the unbearably luminous face, listen and do not hear, only distinguish the music of your favorite voice and its tonality: affectionate, strict, angry. Touch, touch and fear of touch, like a ball lightning strike. As the head of the sunflower is directed to the sun, so all the feelings of the lover are turned to one source of vital energy.

The first love differs from all subsequent ones in that such feelings, the states to a young man before were unknown, and he not only discovers another person in his beauty and attraction, but - above all - reveals himself."What's going on with me?" - that's the bewilderment, joy and fear that most concern the young man and the girl.

First love is devoid of everyday life. It, if you think about it, there is no undivided, because it is self-sufficient. The main need: to see, hear, breathe in one air with a beloved being - is easily satisfied and without the consent of the object of attraction itself.

Perhaps the full and beautiful embodiment of this feeling found in Pushkin's famous poem:

Although the verses were not written by a young man-a mature man who had drunk a cup of passion, but the heart of a great poet is so arranged: it can survive many times light and height, to which not everyonethe mortal will rise one day. Here everything: and the fragility of the feeling( whether there was love - no, gone - is not it, it's not clear), and gentle, without annoyance and resentment, the sadness of an undivided attraction, and the dumbness of the fact that words can not express the fullness of the feeling, from thatthat they are still unaccustomed to the language, they are alien, like foreign ones. And shyness from the same ignorance: what to do with yourself, how to deal with the object of attraction? And dedication, for which the greatest good is the peace and happiness of a loved one.

And when this feeling is gone, then the one who experienced it, and the one who inspired it, will forever remain in their hearts sincere gratitude for the happiness of experiencing the most blissful moments, in any turns of fate, failures and disappointments to remember and know: there was a height!

And how important it is for our attitude that we have visited this altitude ahead of time before we taste other, carnal pleasures.

One of the novellas about a youth caught up in the war tells of a young lieutenant who met his tender romantic love after he knew the physical affinity with a woman.

- I did not have the first love, I started with the second, - he thinks with sad melancholy.

In fact, of course, he is experiencing the very first feeling in his life. What he called "second love", as we know, is not love, but only a bodily desire. But here's what can be predicted with conviction: the sharpness, purity and height of his first love with such an experience will be completely different!

As retribution for impatience, for indiscrimination, for frivolity - shame and disgust for the subject of the "second love" are falling upon the young man very often, instead of the enthusiasm that the "first" gives."The lower the age of young people when entering the first sexual relationship, the less motivated this relationship is in the moral sense, the less love there is in it," says I. S. Kon. With this connection there is no fusion of the spiritual, the heart.

We already know that the deepest traces in our memory, the heart leave the first impressions, sensations, experiences. The first intimacy that has occurred with the unloved person creates a certain and, as a rule, a negative stereotype of the relation to the essence of the other sex. And in subsequent meetings, hobbies will be assumed disappointment, bitterness, which usually arise from "loveless love.""All of them are like that" - that's what will hide in the subconscious, will poison the immediacy and openness of the feeling. Therefore, those young men and men are mistaken who claim that the Don Juan experience helps to recognize the qualities of the female soul, hidden from the unsophisticated view. Rather, on the contrary: a person finds what he is looking for, and does not notice what he does not want to know. Deformed imagination everywhere sees deformities and flaws: it is easier to assert itself in your frivolity and ease of feeling.

If it is very important for a young man to go through the test with romantic love first, in order to understand what kind of women they are, then for a girl this sequence is doubly necessary. In addition to the idea of ​​the ability of a man to be unselfish in love, selfless, trembling and respectful, it is still important for her to realize: what she is! After all, it is a completely different thing: to be a person whom someone admired unselfishly, whom they distinguished, chosen by the heart, and to be the person whom someone desired to satisfy sensual hunger. Such a spiritual experience, of course, does not guarantee from failures, delusions, even falls, but the image-style of the attitude of the first lover to her will be the yardstick by which she will check the behavior of all who pretend to her attention.

First love is an inoculation against age cynicism. Some people endure this inoculation extremely painfully, with complications. This process is especially difficult when the young man simultaneously experiences a pure attraction and erotic desires aimed at different objects. And not completely spoiled youth. What torments this test for a conscientious and sensitive soul turns into is difficult to imagine. Read the recognition of a deep connoisseur of youthful and masculine psychology of V.V. Veresaev, his "Memoirs", stunning with his confessional frankness and even ruthlessness to the "sins of youth".For example, he considered himself in adolescence as a deeply depraved person: thus he estimated his secret thoughts - not acts - addressed to unfamiliar women. At the same time he experienced a tender affection for the three sisters Konopatsky. And "all this turbid soul stream ran past the images of three beloved girls, and not a single spray hit them from this stream. And the dirtier I felt in my soul, the purer and more exalted was my feeling for them. "

So, you can love two or three at once? How many times have lectures on love been given, so many times this question has arisen.

- It is possible if this is not the feeling that captures all the "floors" of a human being, if it is a bodily attraction to one, a friendly disposition towards another, respect for the third, which you take for love.

- You can. If the passion is as ephemeral, indiscriminate, as well as the feeling that lyrical hero V. V. Veresaev experienced for the three sisters. However, this indefinite feeling, the prelude to first love, was enough to save the young soul from corroding cynicism.

From your and your peers of experience, you know how wary are adults to frequent meetings of a girl-girl and a boy-boy. Parents are sometimes panic-driven by teenagers talking about love. In all likelihood, these fears are generated by the fear not that genuine, true love will overshadow their child, but that he will accept erotic anxiety for a high sense. They are afraid and outstripping the love of sexual experience, that this their daughter or son will impoverish their fate. And since both older and younger people use one word - "love", and when they glorify it, and when they frighten themselves and others, it turns out that adults are eternal enemies of the next generation's love, although they consider it to be the greatest happiness in life.

Unfortunately, the fears of adults are by no means groundless. But sometimes it happens that the most reasonable warnings turn into evil. Having listened to the advice of caution in dealing with peers, the girl and the young man, who are still pure in thought, begin to look and, naturally, find in their feelings that secret call of blood that is just waiting to be discovered. Then he will break free, and he will go into the heart, burning his wisdom and self-control on his fire.

Preheat the sensual-erotic curiosity misunderstood, uncritically perceived actions and adventures of the heroes of many love stories, novels. At this time, few can distinguish low-quality, irresponsible works of artists, writers, filmmakers from genuine artistic values. The words are similar and the situations seem to be similar: people meet, fall in love, kiss, enjoy each other, quarrel, suffer, die. .. And guess where the true gold placers of feelings are, and where is the clever fake? And who to imitate, and whom to give a contemptuous smile?

I want to tell you about the sudden turn of the conversation about the first love, when a student of a pedagogical college got up and asked:

- In conversations about the first, and about the "second" love, adults first of all analyze the state and behavior of boys. It's as if girls do not experience anything like this, but immediately get married?

I must admit: this is one of the difficult questions not only for the author of these lines, but also for artists, for psychologists.

Fiction gives us very little to discuss the characteristics of the psychological state of girls at the time of early awakening of love impulses. Re-read pages Tolstoy trilogy "Childhood. Adolescence. Youth".How are the stages of development and development of feelings for the opposite sex in the main character of Nikolay Irteniev and his friends detailed and subtle? And how stupidly the great artist gives the image of the love of Natasha Rostova and Sonya, although it was at this time - the enthusiasm of Boris Drubetskiy - that the beloved heroine appears in the pages of War and Peace, although for Sony her love will be the first and only.

No matter how much this issue was discussed with both high school students and adults, one could not come to a single opinion. One writer attributed this gap in fiction to the account of male dominance in art: patriarchy, they say, is to blame for the fact that women's natures remained undisclosed until the end. A man is not allowed to depict fully the languor of a girl's heart.

But this statement is refuted by the example of Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy, who so deeply and subtly could depict the state of mind of pregnant women: the little princess Bolkonskaya, Kitty Levina, and then the almost surreal connection of the mother with the newborn baby( in Kitty, in Natasha).The researcher of the creative work of Leo Tolstoy VV Veresaev believed that it is useful to read these pages to young girls for penetration into the region of high passions and noble sufferings.

So, it's not in patriarchy. Then in what?

We must finally admit that all achievements in the description of women's psychology with great writers should be shared by their girlfriends, wives, beloved, who sincerely and in detail explained everything that happened to them during this or that period of their sensual and spiritual life.(Such a proposition in Gorky's essay on SA Tolstoy.) But they did not want or could not tell as impressively about their very first love attraction. Is it because that feeling arose so early that neither one could understand themselves or the others, so far no one has really succeeded in telling.

This idea is prompted by the findings of modern researchers of sexual psychology. Physiologically, the girl begins to wake up much earlier than the boy: in 9-10 years( the boys are late for 3 or more years).And this means: she does not have time to mature for the analysis of the feelings she is experiencing. The vocabulary, the conceptual apparatus of it is still quite childish. What could Natasha do and say when she was a thirteen-year-old teenager, when she was lit up by the enthusiasm of older Sonya and Nikolai? She invites Boris to kiss his doll. When he refuses, she kisses him, as if copying the behavior of the lovers seriously Sonya and Nicholas. And what will the ten-year-old girl, who experienced the first injections of her weak heart, do? Confused, run away, will laugh for no reason, or, on the contrary, puff, will look at the beech and dare - all the same as a three-year-old child does when the guests who came to him come to him. Girls grow up faster than boys. But unlike boys, they try to hide this growing up, although in the recesses of the soul they triumph, experiencing their transformation from a girl to a girl. Stealth is another reason that we know so little about the feelings of young women. Where is it from, what is caused?

- At the age of ten, I already knew everything about the relationship of men and women, the patient admitted to a specialist psychologist. "But she pretended both to her parents, to her friends, and even to her older sister who was closest to me. She pretended to be a complete ignoramus. And in every possible way suppressed their attempts to "enlighten" me. Something inside of me vehemently resisted exposing these aspects of human relations. I read love books about love, but I hid my eyes when I saw kissing movie heroes, and my heart sank sweetly and fell.

The survey, which I managed to conduct among women of different ages, upbringing and temperament, convinced: this behavior is not an anomaly, not an accident. On the contrary, it is quite frequent, if only the family had normal conditions, if the frivolity of adults did not put on the public view and discussion the intimate aspects of being. Moreover, it is among morally resistant women that one often encounters resistance to sexual enlightenment. They are the most difficult to give talks on the topic of keeping the body clean and cleanliness of character even with their own daughter.

- Khannozhestvo, - arrogantly throw one.

- Calmness, - echo them others.

- Natural women's bashfulness, - they will be objected to by others.

But here's an example. A man of high culture and courage, a wonderful Russian poet Marina Tsvetaeva was so afraid of future sexual intercourse when she was a teenager that she nearly committed suicide in order to never get close to a man.

If you think about different reasons for the first love of a young man and a girl has a very good reason. For a young man, the first feeling, divided and completed, is perceived as a wonderful moment, but for a girl always involves fear and doubt.

For the young man the most grievous affliction is the refusal of the girlfriend to share and "prove" the feeling.

For a girl, as a rule, on the contrary - the consent is fraught with suffering, often with all the crippled life.

From here, probably, and restraint, stealth in the manifestations of emotions. And, of course, public opinion is more important! Remember all meetings, long or fleeting relationships, refreshed yourself and everything around with a clean, clear light of poetic enthusiasm. And try to determine what it was: the prelude of love or she herself is your First, beautiful, unforgettable? And it does not matter whether this hobby was a real person or a hero of a work of art, whether it was seen, divided or not. What has it changed in your character, the outlook on the outside world, on people,

peers? What circumstances have cooled the ardor of the heart? What did you yourself do to keep her footprint longer, her warmth in her soul?

And yet - look around you: maybe right now, experiencing a heartfelt hunger, you repel someone's kind, loyal heart, ready to serve you unselfishly. And do not notice the soul mate only because its appearance is not the most spectacular, because it's Cinderella, and not the proud princess, Ivanushka, and not the royal son. And again it is proposed to conduct a study of one's own soul without publicity. Unless to mum to trust, if with it there was a friendly confidence. In the same classes it is better to discuss examples from newspapers, films, from literature, in recent years this theme - the first adolescent love - has become very popular.

Quite rightly warned us against the readiness to open the heart for public review the outstanding connoisseur of human and especially youthful heart VA Sukhomlinsky."This mystery is great," said the ancients about love. And no matter how much research we carry out, no matter how it is typified by its manifestations, yet everyone's feeling will be significantly different from all known cases. In this, the strength, the greatness, and the attraction of love - in its uniqueness.

Bioenergy of love

Love comes and goes. But not from someone who has the secret of love energy vibrations. At all times I built family relationships and they were protected by a woman. She was the bereguine of her lover.

And without any special rituals here it did not do. So, you love him, but not quite sure that you are loved. How to make him fall in love( or do not stop loving you)?There are several effective methods related to bioenergetics.

First, let's try to find answers to such questions. What is love? Why does not love arise at all and not always, when you want, and sometimes even against our mind( love of evil)?So, love is a coincidence of energy vibrations in two people. That is, love can arise in people with related, close energy vibrations. Therefore, if you want to evoke sympathy from somebody, let alone love, you have to learn how to adapt to the energy vibrations of your partner and unite your and his energy vibrations. How to do it?

Any color is a very powerful energy that we underestimate. And yet quite recently, about 50 years ago, women and girls sewed identical and identical shirts for themselves and loved them and embroidered them with the same color and pattern. And in the past centuries, lovers wore the same color ribbons and nasal silk scarves, the same color dresses and camisoles. For what? To ensure that the color scheme was harmonious, to look like a couple.

You know what clothes and what color your beloved prefers. Try to dress in his color scheme and style. Then you will look like a pair( not only for others, but for each other).If he came for you in blue jeans, safely put on blue jeans. If he is in a business suit, wear a business suit of the same color. Dexterously falling into his style and color, without any words you will convince him that they are created for each other, because you look great together! You can go to the mirror together with him and ask: "Are we looking good?" Or to arrange with a friend in advance that after seeing you, she will exclaim: "How cool you are to each other!"

Each sound also has its own energy vibrationsand has an effect on our subconscious. Sounds, like colors, heal. And, of course, there is nothing sweeter for a man than the sound of his name. Ideally fit each other people with similar names. It is desirable that there are at least two consonantal sounds in the names. For example, Marina and Dmitry( Marat), Elena and Leonid, Natalia and Anatoly( Anton).And what should you do if your names do not have any letters at all?. . You can change any name to a diminutive one or create such a gentle nickname so that common sounds appear. If he calls you some kind of gentle word, then immediately pick up this word of consonant and semantic pair and call it so. You are a kitten, then he is a kitten or a cat, you are a kabash, then he is a baksy, you are a fox, he is a fox, a fox, you are a princess, he is a prince. By the way, our great-great. .. this rule was known and actively used. Let us recall folk tales and songs: a dove and a dove, a tsar and a queen, a swan and a swan. One of the strongest ancient plots for love begins with these words: "You are a lion, I am your lioness. You are my dove, I am your dove. "

To unite energy vibrations are helped by very simple household activities that do not cause suspicion on his part. For example, you can sometimes eat from one plate or treat each other( you treat it from your plate, on a fork, carry a piece in his mouth, he takes you out of his), drink from one glass or cup. Eating an apple? Divide it in half - eat half of it yourself, give it to him( and you must eat your part).Try to eat all the fruits, cakes, pies and rolls. The fact is that food is also energy. By sharing food, you get the same energy, and it unites you, regardless of your desire!

It is very effective to wipe with one towel( it is better if the towel is his, and you wipe it off, if your towel, at first go to the bathroom yourself, and then give him your towel).Of course, in terms of hygiene, this should not be done, but from the point of view of mutual love the method works without fail, if you are sure of its health. It's great if at home you can wear some of his things, and he's yours( for example, terry robes, t-shirts, slippers).This will unite your energies;thanks to things you can exchange them.

Astrologers have noticed another amazing regularity: men are much more likely to fall in love with those women with whom they walk late in the evening with the starry sky. When they look at the starry sky, the souls merge. Therefore, the more often you look with your beloved on the stars, the more harmony and unity will be in your relationship. And further! Do not tell anyone about what you did for your loved one. Firstly, you do not need gossip, and secondly, when you talk about it, you will lose energy.