How to wean a child to jade - we teach the child how to misbehave

It would seem that such an innocuous and to some extent pleasant to the parents habit of the child - to tell the whole "truth", but to fight it! Otherwise, children in the future may have serious problems in dealing with people. Therefore, adults should not rely on the fact that their son or daughter, becoming older, and they themselves will understand what to say, and what is worth keeping silent about - you need to think about how to disinfect your child and how to still keep the opportunity to control the events in lifechildren.

Than such a habit

In addition to the fact that the child has an incorrect system of moral values ​​- he is ready at any moment to betray his comrade, this habit will very slow down his personal development. The fact is that all his attention, all his energy, will not be directed at getting yourself better, but for revealing the shortcomings of others. And since he was able to expose his peers - he is already better than they! Especially it works, if the parents, having listened to the next "report" of their offspring, say: "You see, what they are bad! You are not like that! "You do not have to do anything in order to become good - it's enough to accrue adults.

Yaboda!

Child teases at school

Children, though naive, but for some reason very quickly calculate in their ranks the one who peddles, and reward him with an insulting nickname of "scum"!But it would not be so bad - they refuse to be friends with him! Children's collective is stern: a small outcast will be very difficult. After all, the guys openly express their dislike by all means available to them: they refuse to sit next to each other, do not give toys( and textbooks, pens, etc.) in school, they are called, teased - they create all conditions for their "enemy"occasion to cry.

The parents of

Of course, we will not say that the parents taught their child to be misleading - not at all. He could borrow this method from other children. But in the fact that they did not notice in time that the child has problems in the team, or did not pay attention to the fact that he overly diligently "criticizes" his peers - this already has a share of their guilt. True, everything can be corrected if one asks in time how to disaccustom a child and how to do it competently from the pedagogical point of view, that is, without offending the son or daughter and not losing their trust.

Everything needs to be explained

Explain why

can not be misinterpreted. Any remark to the child should be correct. And when he once again runs up to you to tell you what the "other boy" or "other girl" did, do not cut it short in the middle. Be sure to listen to him, and then try to explain that you do not need to tell adults about every bad word or ugly act of some comrade in kindergarten or school. Tell us how to treat the slanders in groups, including adults. Try to shift the child's attention to himself: does he always act well? At the same time, always make it clear that situations are different. If someone's words or actions are a direct threat to someone, then surely you need to tell adults about it.

Honor concepts

Sometimes it's hard to explain to a child theoretically what is good and what's bad. It is easier to do all this with examples. But where do you take these examples from life? Indeed, it is not very ethical to refer to facts from the lives of neighbors or acquaintances and even more so to analyze them.

Teach your child to read: in children's fiction, you can find a lot of both positive and negative characters - here on the example of their actions and, accordingly, the consequences of good or bad actions, bring up your sons and daughters.

Trust is one of the methods of solving the educational task

Trust between parent and child Of course, it is very difficult for the child to suppress the desire to tell the "news" that he was able to obtain. Put yourself in its place: after all, we, adults, having learned some juicy details from the life of our colleagues or relatives, if we do not condemn, at least we will be surprised. Similarly, the child wants to talk, in other words - a little gossip. Agree with him about this: promise him to keep secretly what he will tell you. A small interlocutor will satisfy the need to share news, and you can filter out important information - one that can play a role in your child's life. At the same time he will know for sure that he is not a "slander" - he never told anyone! And you promised never to retell anything.

Keep your word, by the way, firmly. And even if it happens sometime that the received information can not be hidden from other adults, imagine everything so that your child's name is not mixed up - pretend to have learned everything entirely from another source.

Children can and should make mistakes - the task of adults is to teach them to behave in such a way that later it was easy for them to build relationships in their family and in the team. Encourage them to honor from the earliest childhood.