Support the child in all situations
My daughter, having finished school, entered the university. The institution she chose was in Manchester, and I remember how we went there with her, and I hoped she would not choose him, but my hopes did not materialize. She grew up in the countryside, and I just could not imagine how she would live in a big city so far from home. But I did not tell her about this, but I tried my best to support her choice, which she herself seemed the best. And now I'm very glad that I did it because I was completely wrong. Years of study have developed at it perfectly.
It would be absurd to assume that everything that your children are doing will seem to you a wise decision, starting from the chosen profession and ending with who and how they will raise their own children. But they are adults, and they can be just as right as you. And even, probably, more often than you, because they know themselves better than you know them. The example from which I started demonstrates why you should keep your opinion to yourself and try in any case to support your child: if it turns out that you were wrong, but at the same time they were bending their line, you will look absolutely stupid.
Of course, it may turn out that you were right. But if the child was mistaken, then all the more you need your encouragement and support. The main thing that you must understand is his life and his choice, as we have already said, and your only task is to support him if you wish him well.
There is another reason to support the child in any decision: so you do not risk being tempted to say afterwards: "Now, I told you!. ." I believe you are aware that this is the worst thing you can tell a child, and it is unforgivableany circumstances.
YOU DO NOT RISK TO BE SURPRISED BY THE CONSEQUENCES OF APPLICATION: "HERE, I SAID IT!. ."
Some children will suffer very much if they do not feel that you are on their side. Others are more prone to rebellion and will do you spite, if only they feel the slightest pressure from your side. But even if your child does not belong to any of these extreme categories, he still needs your support, even if he has already left the parental home. Therefore, it is not enough to maintain neutrality - you must actively express your solidarity.