Divorce
Marriages happen in heaven - it's common knowledge. And divorces? At this point, heaven, it seems, has nothing to do with it, if only because the percentage of divorcees, alas, does not decrease.
In itself, divorce is the achievement of a civilized society, but today, due to the growing sad popularity, has become socially dangerous. For the personal life that has failed is drawn by a heap of painful questions. The main victims of parental errors are children. ..
The July press release of the State Statistics Committee of the Russian Federation indicates: over the past year( 1988), 950 thousand families have disintegrated. One-fourth of married couples break up a common life( a very common mistake: only 1.4% of married couples exist in the country, and a quarter is from the number registered in this year.).Needless to say, the statistics are bleak. But today it gives some chances for optimism, Over the past five years, the growth line, booming, has stopped. The number of divorced families stably keeps on the same level. The collection "Population of the Russian Federation" states: in the 1960s and 1970s there was a particularly noticeable increase in disintegrating families. In digital design it looks like this: in 1960 - 270.2 thousand divorce, in 1970 - 636.2, in 1980 - 929.6 thousand.
Even this dynamics over thirty years shows the dependence of the family on the social situation in the society. Positive changes that are taking place in our country today should positively affect the family. Tired of the ceremonial slogans, reaching a social and economic impasse, when factories and plants were built and exploited min for the sake of new factories and plants, we seemed to have recovered from hypnosis. Having woken up, they understood: a man, his joys, pains and hopes is the most important. So, it is important how he lives in the family, whether his house is comfortable, whether his refrigerator is empty, how kids grow. ..
At the highest level, the problems of strengthening the family are being discussed today. Eliminate one of the main causes that are destructively affecting the family - the plight of a married working woman - this concern was heard in many speeches at the Congress of People's Deputies. A Committee for Women's Affairs, Family Protection, Motherhood and Childhood was established and started to operate. The second year the weekly "Family" is published. The results of the activity of the Soviet children's fund are visible. ..
It was believed that the youngest couples aged up to 20 years were most likely and most likely to fall apart. And it seemed to be calmer so to think - what to take from them: who was not young, he was not stupid! But statistics do not join this opinion. The crisis of the family, it turns out, most often occurs in the spouses at the age of 25-29 years( 234 thousand divorced, 818 thousand children, who remained without one of the Rodin-Lei).The next "dangerous" age - 30-34 years( 180 thousand divorces, there are 200 thousand children).It turns out that at the break, and we will think this is always a serious and difficult step for both of us, the spouses are not at all young, and not at all frivolous.
If beginners have a strong rear in the face of parents( apartment, material support, help in raising a child) - their happiness. But how often the newly created family goes on a voyage literally on a flimsy ship. And it is not surprising that the love boat, as the poet said, is broken about everyday life. The lack of housing and its unfriendliness, wretchedness of life, drunkenness are the main risk factors. How many of these letters!
"The daughter and the son-in-law after the termination of Tomsk university in 1975 have been directed to Chelyabinsk, in industrial association" Signal ".They poured them into a room of 12 sq. M.m. There and live to this day with two sons. Due to unbearable living conditions, the son-in-law gradually became addicted to drinking. For the sake of an apartment in 1983 he went to work on a construction site as a loader. Recently, they distributed apartments, but because of his booze they pushed the queue. The daughter is in despair. And my son-in-law is a pity - a kind, clever person, his children love him. They punished the family, and she is at the breaking up. .. "
Who here to show the bill? In one the author of the letter is right: the justice of the punishment of deprivation of housing is questionable - the family suffers first of all. I'm sure: you must approach this very carefully in every case.
Rarity, when the city authorities take care of families, help them survive in everyday storms. I remember the story of the large family Prigozhikh from Vitebsk. The city council built a wonderful two-story mansion in the center of the city. But that was so rare a fact that the material was called: "Let's believe in a miracle!"
The crisis of the family, the problems that tear it apart, in recent times have been a reluctantly debated topic. And it was absolutely "indecent" to talk about the excessive workload of a working woman. But today 270 thousand women work on heavy manual and semi-mechanized works, 65 thousand are engaged in heavy path work, 4 000 000 women work in night shifts, 80% make heavy non-mechanized labor in trade, where mainly women work. Add to these loadings a home shift in the kitchen, do not miss the exhausting queues, the crush in the transport. .. Teach how, with all this, remain gentle and beautiful, what husbands want to see us!. .
Generally, family-related figures are alarming. But here's one simply depressing. A working mother spends an average of 17 minutes a day to raise a child and 15 minutes - to care for him.17 minutes! Is this not the answer to desperate questions like: "Well, why are they like that?"
The weekly "Family" recently issued on the front page terrible figures: 1,100,000 children live and are educated by the state in children's boarding schools and institutions. Orphanhood on this scale we knew only in the terrible years of war and famine.1,185,000 children suffer from mental illness.900,000 adolescents are detained annually for offenses.2194 children committed suicide in 1987. ..
We can rest assured that all these unfortunate children had no real home.775,000 children are deprived of one of their parents each year in a family crash. The fate of the child who remains on the ruins of the house is always a difficult fate. Sometimes the couple, as if crazy, are judged, shares, forgetting about the moral duty to a small man. And it does not surprise at all the fact that among the decaying pairs almost half grew up in an incomplete family and does not know the parental example of harmonious relations.
. .. Sad turned out a conversation, for a sad topic. Not consoles and other people's statistics: not only do we have so many families break up. For example, in the US( and they are world record holders for divorce), half of marriages fall apart. In European countries, the picture is approximately the same.
What's happening to us? Maybe love has left our pragmatic age? No. Sociologists say that 90 percent of marriages are still made for love. So, with all the adversity of everyday life it can be saved!
How to preserve happiness? What recipes will help? If one day an adult daughter asks me about this, I can say one thing: you saw and fell in love with your chosen one, his best side, his best qualities. Do not lose them in the hustle and bustle of everyday life! Be tolerant, prudent. ..