American family
The American family is nuclear, monogamous, partially patriarchal, partly egalitarian, the norm for it is considered to be a non-local residence and two-way relationship. These terms characterize the family, but do not give a complete picture of the true family life in the United States. For most couples, the process of forming a new family begins with romantic love.
Romantic Love
The San Francisco Chronicle columnist addressed a group of young people from the Bay Area with the question: "What kind of adventure do you dream all your life?" One of the women gave the following characteristic response: "I've already come up with everything: go toParis, to meet there their love and with their loved one to sail on a boat - they have a river there in the heart of the city. I want it to be like in movies. I think of Paris and I imagine how I stand on the stage, built from tables, and sing the famous French songs, everyone is happy and they love each other. "("San Francisco Chronicle." January 12, 1980).
Probably, the Parisian would laugh this romantic image. After all, they almost do not differ from American women - they work as teachers, typists, waitresses. But if a reporter from the Chronicles had gone to Paris, he probably would have met young Parisians dreaming of long embraces and endless boat rides. .. on Italian lakes.
Italians, Frenchmen, Americans and other Westerners have adopted such ideas of love that are part of their culture. Under the influence of these ideas, the expectations of people falling in love are formed. In addition, they help people determine their feelings. Some of these ideas are far from new. They arose in the court environment XI-XII centuries.almost 900 years ago from the feudal ideal of absolute devotion to the vassal to the master.
In the XVIII century.these ideas about love were improved under the influence of new ideas. The search for love became the decisive stage in the development of the personality. For middle-class women who usually stayed home when the men left for work, the love "became the main meaning of life, the decisive event on which all life's benefits depended: livelihoods, social progress and success, playing a decisive role for the middle class".Thus, the search for true love embodies the self-awareness of the individual. It expresses the desire of a person to find his place in social life, a moral assessment of his true essence.
In Jane Austen's novels, the knowledge of her "I" is described: in the feeling of love, there is a merging of two souls, revealing the character traits that only her lover can appreciate. And the recognition of its merits contributes to the moral perfection of the heroine. Because love has awakened the best qualities of lovers, in marriage both are rewarded in justice. According to the myth of love, in a world where people are often deeply lonely, love can destroy everything superficial and penetrate the very depths of the soul. Therefore, in love, people know each other and their own inner world. "
Marriage in the United States is based on love more than in any other society. In most other societies( especially in the past) marriages were arranged by the families of the bride and groom. For example, in England in the XVII century.marriage was a kind of exchange between family clans, sometimes a dowry was supposed to be equal to a small state. Therefore, the fate of the family depended on marriage, thanks to which the family property could be fully preserved( Poster, 1980).In this context, marriage was not at all based on love.