How to survive the betrayal of a loved one - how to survive the betrayal of a loved one, husband
Betrayal is a rather broad concept, everyone understands absolutely different under it. So it is quite possible to call treason of a loved one, violation of a promise made by any person, telling an unnecessary person the secrets that no one should know and many other things. One fact remains unchanged: after any betrayal in everyone's soul there is a deep wound, a person simply loses faith in all absolutely people. How to survive the betrayal of a loved one?
Betrayal of your beloved
We all try to find support and understanding in our loved ones and loved ones, we trust them, reveal all our innermost secrets and believe that who really is, but they will never deceive us. We all need the warmth of our loved ones and the confidence that if trouble happens, they will support us and help us. And it is because of this that the worst pain is always after the betrayal of a person whom you genuinely love.
At its core, any betrayal is treason. And it is not necessarily physical, the moral sometimes hurts far more painfully. .. And worst of all, that usually it is impossible to prepare for such situations, they can not be foreseen and warned. It remains only to suffer silently about the ruined trust.
If you are betrayed. ..
Usually, if a person is betrayed, emotions begin to overwhelm him. For example, in a situation where a woman was changed by a husband. All her actions and thoughts are usually dictated by emotions. First, she can look for the reasons for the betrayal, dig into herself, look for her own faults, blame herself for this change. The next day she has only hatred for her husband. Another day comes depression, tears. .. And all this is absolutely wrong behavior, the problem can not be solved that way. And you need to try to do it, get rid of your experiences.
Do not know how to survive the betrayal of her husband? Read the tips and all you will succeed.
Spill emotions
You do not need to bury yourself in a blanket and go into yourself, in an attempt to wait for the moment when the pain inside just stops. If you want to scream, shout. Want to beat the desperate dishes - beat. One woman can go to write letters to herself, and then reread them, others need to somehow throw out all the emotions on paper, for example.
If the pain does not have an outlet, it simply "settles down" in the body, and then after some time may well manifest itself as a disease. Let this pain come out! After all, at this moment in your life you have the right to any manifestation of your emotions. The only thing that is best done is to try to protect your children from all possible hysterics. It will not do them good.
Keep distance from the
situation Have you shouted? Great! And now try to pretend that all this horror did not happen to you. Distant from the problem. Best if you will communicate with your husband only if necessary. And you do not need to go far away, and there is not always such an opportunity, just try to push the whole situation away from you until it ceases to be so painful for you. And in general, not only on the same relationship with her husband the whole world is being built! You have friends, relatives, work, in the end. Give all this maximum time and attention. And it's best to spend the first months of your free time not with your closest friends. So you will not be tempted to constantly pour your friends feelings and emotions from the experience.
Have you seen someone for many years? Fine, now is the best time to visit them. In the workplace, try to take only the most interesting and exciting projects for you. But it is better to move difficult assignments for a while, if possible. Otherwise, just might not have enough strength and you will fail. From hobbies it is best to choose the most beloved and interesting. Can there be a theater? Spend the delayed money on tickets and go to the show. Or can travel? This is a great option, which will perfectly "clean" your brains. And the holiday romance can happen. ..
Take a look at the truth
Well, did you get the feeling that you are standing on your feet again? Fine, now it's time to get to work. In its present state, most of the thoughts and feelings are assigned to itself. You feel sorry for yourself, but at the same time you hate for having managed to bring your life to a real nightmare in a matter of months. Thoughts "how did I let that happen to me" constantly stun you and lead you into a dead end. ...
Forgive yourself, because guilt is the most destructive of all feelings. Yes, maybe you did something wrong, but are there people who never make a mistake? Find your mistakes and live on.
In most cases, male cheating is easy. For your husband, they are just a way to fill the void that might have arisen in your relationship. . And the thought that this could lead to a divorce from you is really frightening for him. He just does not want to lose all that was between you because of the momentary weakness.
Try to analyze your life( you can ask for help from a psychologist), find the places where you "surrendered".Maybe you stopped watching yourself as before? Take yourself in hand: visit the hairdresser and beautician, buy new things. Or maybe you are lost as a person among all these everyday problems? Understand and the man too: he after all needs that woman in which he once fell in love, instead of the housewife who only and thinks of house affairs. Stop thinking about the fact that you are so wonderful, but he does not appreciate you, try to understand him himself. And when you are ready to hear not only your grievances and pain, you can move on to the next point.
Sit down at the negotiating table
Sit down at this table and start communicating at last. Listen and say. It can be very hard. If it seems that you yourself can not cope, again, contact a psychologist.
Think about it, because the fact that you once met, fell in love with each other, raised much more inner strength for children than for any treason. And this "episode" has its own reasons - it is necessary to find them, voice one another and continue to live on taking into account all the conclusions drawn. Stop thinking how to survive the betrayal of her husband. Just step on it.
Start a new life
No matter how strange it may seem, but infidelity quite often only bring the couple together and make the marriage stronger. But this can happen only in the case when a woman gets to stay on the verge between unrestrained hysteria, which she will later regret all her life and normal life.
Remember that the main role in building a new life will lie exactly on you. Find the strength in yourself. After all, you have the whole life ahead of you! And the main thing is that in this life you do not lose trust in people. Of course, do not rush into the pool, you need to constantly think whether the person is your trust, but if you completely shut out from all the surrounding people, you will be very unhappy.
A person who does not trust anyone in life, most of all suffers himself. No one can live without support, trust and support. But still, now you know how to survive the betrayal of a loved one. Let there be a person in your life who deserves your trust 100%.And remember that from any situation there is a way out!