How to get rid of jealousy - how to overcome jealousy
Jealousy is a destructive feeling associated with suspicion, distrust of a partner and doubts that you are loved. Jealousy is inherent in both men and women, and often hurts both sides. Before looking for the answer to the question "How to get rid of jealousy?", It is necessary to understand what is its cause.
Jealousy as a result of low self-esteem
The most common cause of jealousy is low self-esteem. It is the lack of self-confidence that makes us doubt the love and faithfulness of another person. But, in fact, we do not doubt it, but in ourselves. It seems to a person that he is not good enough that he can not really be loved, because there is nothing. The problem of self-esteem goes to childhood, because it is formed under the influence of the views of parents and others. The child's comparison with other children is detrimental. All these examples that parents often bring to their children: "Look, which Masha is tidy," "Sasha is so good at learning," and "Svetochka - a real beauty" - are subsequently expressed in the belief that the partner will necessarily find themselves more intelligent or beautiful.
To get rid of the jealousy caused by insecurity in yourself, you need to work on yourself. By the way, your companion can help in this, telling you why he loves you. When you accept that you have more virtues, you will find it easier to believe in yourself. Change the attitude toward yourself will help and constant self-development, both intellectually and in the moral. Awareness of one's own attractiveness also helps to increase self-esteem and relieves jealousy - "Where else will he find someone like me".However, here it is necessary to be very cautious. All that you do in terms of your self-improvement, should be done, first of all, for your sake, and not because of the fear of losing another person. Only when a person loves himself for who he is, one can unreservedly believe that another person loves him.
Jealousy from boredom
It happens that people are jealous of boredom, not in the sense that they have nothing to do, although this may be the case, but more often from boredom in the relationship - from the fact that the relationship is too smooth, without special emotional outbursts. The love of drama is more characteristic of women, they want passions and strong emotions. Therefore, the "game" of jealousy, with the goal of diversifying life, is a possible option. The only problem is that a partner can wear down this causeless jealousy, and at some point instead of diversifying the relationship, it will be possible to destroy them.
In a similar situation, a person has to admit that this is an unhealthy way, and we need to look for more adequate means to refresh the relationship: a romantic weekend, a surprise meeting - any option will be better than anything unreasonable jealousy.
Environment
Often the environment becomes a source of fear and suspicion. Surrounding jealous people involuntarily fueled his fears with stories of numerous love triangles, stories of a neighbor who found her husband with a secretary, and other common cliché stories. A person begins to suspect everyone and everything: "The husband stayed at work, but is he really at work?", "What kind of sudden business could arise on a day off?"These and similar thoughts roam in my head, turning a normal woman into a hypochondriac person, looking with suspicion at her husband and demanding an explanation if he lingered for an hour. By the way, this behavior can dislodge your companion and suggest that, perhaps, you should connect your life with a more adequate person.
Of course, this development is possible if the person is too impressed and there is a share of insecurity. But anyway, you can not listen to all the nonsense people talk about, and project unsightly situations on yourself. By the way, this concerns not only jealousy, but also other life situations. A tendency to always expect that something bad will happen, poison life and prevent happiness.
Flirtation and jealousy of
All of the above situations relate to jealousy of a groundless, conditioned by the characteristics of the worldview of a person who is jealous. However, it happens that you are given a reason to be jealous. For example, frank flirting your companion with another woman at a party.
In such a situation only frank conversation with a person will help. Do not roll up the stage right at the event, it will not do you good. It is better to talk in a quiet environment at home, to explain why this situation is unacceptable for you. Often people, especially at the dawn of a relationship, when they still do not know each other well, do not quite understand how the partner perceives what is happening and what awaits from the relationship. It is better to clarify everything at once, this will help avoid disagreements and misunderstandings in the future.