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  • Parents should sometimes get angry.

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    It seems to me that young idealists, entering into their parents' age, imagine that they possess an inexhaustible fount of patience and love for their innocent child. But this, alas, not in the power of human. When the baby angrily screams for hours continuously, no matter how hard you try to calm him, you are unlikely to feel sympathy for him. He's so ungrateful, stubborn, unsympathetic, it's just impossible not to get angry with him-really angry. And then your eldest did something that he should not have done, and he knew it well! Maybe he was so interested in some fragile and expensive subject for you, or he wanted to play with children on the other side of the street so much that he could not resist the temptation. Or he was just angry with you when you turned him down in something, or he got angry at the baby you are paying so much attention to. In this case, he will do something just to spite. If a child violates a reasonable and well-understood rule, it is not time to pretend to be a Themis statue. Good parents do not hide anger or outrage from the child. That's what your parents did to you. This is

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    your rules are violated. This your property suffered. This is your child, which you care about so much, did not do well. You can not help feeling indignant. The child naturally expects this, and it will not offend if your reaction is fair.

    Sometimes you need some time to realize that you have lost patience. Having sat down at the table, the child creates one disgrace after another: lets go of unflattering remarks about food, almost deliberately overturns a glass of milk, plays something that is forbidden to play, and breaks it, tears up the younger brother or sister - all this you are tryingnot to notice, making supernatural efforts to keep calm. But because of some other misconduct, which in itself is not so serious, your patience bursts and you even become somewhat frightened of your own fury. When you look back and remember the whole series of bad deeds, then you realize that the child all morning asked for punishment, he was waiting for the manifestation of firmness on your part - and only your desire at all costs to keep the patience forced him to move from one provocation to anotherthe other in anticipation, when he will be stopped.

    We are all angry with our children and because of the stresses and troubles that we experience in communicating with other people. Here's a picture close enough to life: the father returns home after work, weary and tired - he scolds his wife, who takes the evil out on the older child, scolds him for an act that usually does not cause disapproval - and he, in turn,on the younger sister.